experiences

Lee Hi - It's over MV [English subs Romanization Hangul] HD - Vídeo Dailymotion
i love YG's artist.confident song. i like

one day,just got back from work, tengok bawah tudung saji, makanan baru masak, sup ayam & kobis goreng. "korang tak makan lagi ke?", tanya kat famili. "belom", one of them answered shortly. pastu terus fikir, "hmmm, mesti nak paksa suroh makan sama2, kol bape da ni nak dekat kol 11, da la semalam pun makan bege tengah malam pastu tido terus kekenyangan". ye, takot gemok, typical mindset of insecure young female adult. pastu, sebab fikir mesti diorang pun lapar waiting for me, gi la ke dapur cedok nasi, by the time nak amek lauk, ayam da abes. "eh, awak tak makan lagi ke?" kakak tanya. "ha'ah, belom". then, tersedar i could answer this better, "takla, tak lapar pon, takpela korang makanla" selepas kakak beria-ia ajak kongsi ayam die. memang tak lapar sangat pon.

it just hit me then. betapa cepatnya kite bersangka buruk (about kena 'paksa' makan togede-gede tengah malam), tengok-tengok ajak makan pon takde. i mean, for sure diorang ingat i dah makan, which is cool for me. memang tak kisah pun, because i rela starve dari makan tengah malam (tapi kadang2 bedal je kalo lapa sangat). so, what i'm trying to say is. ALLAH KNOWS BEST. thats it. saya sebagai manusia yang lemah kadang2 can't help but sangka buruk at first, but in the end it all works out, in ways i may not expect, but for sure terbaik untuk saya

p/s : sori for the very petty example untuk deliver the mesej in capslock above. lain orang lain kan

hmm, nak sharing lagi. masa gi london & ireland aritu, gagah je travel sorang2. tak sesat pon, yela kat airport  banyak gile kot sign, really hard to miss, memang tak penah dengar ar kan orang sesat kat airport. tapi aritu nak gi uitm shah alam boleh sesat. padahal adik da bagi direction sume2, siap buat note kat fon lagi. boleh lagi sesat. =_= whatta.. masa kat ireland, nak wat reunion kelas, tapi diorang ade kelas, i plak sibok jadi tourist, so plan la jumpe kat restoran terus, kawan pon btaw la direction through fon, which i obviously never been to. tup2, leh sampai paling awal. i take pride being the first you know. ehem. another incident, i was supposed to balik rumah classmate in ireland, which i already done so with them a few times, tapi boleh lagi sesat. =_=

funny how when i'm all independent, i can do fine on my own. tapi bile ade orang lain, i tend to depend on them, u know, malas nak amek tahu sebab 'mereka' ada and i managed to get myself lost.

ye, another sharing. masa nak gi genting aritu, punyala excited nak naik rollercoaster semua ride bagai. tapi bile da naik, sumpah rasa nak turun. ingatkan best gle, rupanya nak terkeluar jantung. all i can think about is getting off the ride that instant. true, it may be enjoyable for most people (duhhh) but maybe, its not for me

Trust is like a mirror..once its BROKEN you can never look at it the same again...

this one. hmm, i guess the quote speaks for itself.

just realised how STUPID i can be. GOD!! ya Allah, i am totally at your mercy.
be realistic fatihah, focus, jangan membazir and just use your time properly, seriously

of me and kpop and songs

bape kali asyik tergerak nk post pasal favourite spot to eat bile makan2 dengan siblings 

or my love for my 'cute collection' when i'm wearing/looking at them 

or my list of favourite food when i'm eating them (duh), u know happy-post-dan-yang-sewaktu-dengannya. tapi bile bukak blog je, feel nk letak mende2 koyak je. maybe next time ye, "happy post". 

ye, jom layan lagu koyak bersama fatihah. 

chillax, its just a song, doesn't mean every lyric reflects my feelings.

maybe some, take your pick

u dont know how tempted i was to post these songs on my facebook, i'm glad i have my blog.heh

moving on

am glad

i've done something i'd never thought i would. something risky....




well, atleast for me.

however, i wasn't as hurt as i thought. maybe bcoz i was too prepared for it? wallahhualam.

maybe bcoz i'm so used to running away, i thought that confrontation was something out of my reach, out of my capability. (over the top, i know)

but now, i've done it! i've faced my problem! although the result weren't in my favour, surprisingly i'm allright. like seriously, i'm ok. i don't feel crying, i feel absolutely relieved actually. heh. i feel like i can face anything now, datangla masalah pe pun, i can face it! (ok, over lg sekali, sorry)

oh, SALAM MAAL HIJRAH! in which i think come just at the right moment. just when i needed to move on the most. sudah2la dengan kalau ini, kalau itu. just move forward. i mean it JUST MOVE FORWARD. (ye, kena ulang & di'caps lock'kn) this however, doesn't mean that i'll forget everything that had happenned, but rather than menyesal-non-stop-thinking-u-can-do-better-blablabla i'd like to take pengajaran from all of it. promised myself that i wont ever make that same mistake. always be thankful with what i have now and always know that everything happened for a reason. 

u know what, i think i'm getting better at telling people what i feel. i mean, meluahkn perasaan yg terbuku, instead of just keeping it to yourself, which can drive u crazy. *ayat xle blah. i can open up to people better now. and i'm quite happy about that *pat myself in the back. mcm adik kata "luahkan je sampai habis, sampai takde apa da tinggal" and it really did me good. thanxla sis! ;)

dalam hati ada taman. heh

All time favourites. apparently masih suka layan lagu jiwang. heh

just so happens, semuanya black people yg nyanyi. suara diorang memang lemak berkrim. seryes.
my lullaby(s) for tonight

taktaw nak bagi tajuk apa

hai. lama x berblog. teringin jgk kadang2 tu nak berblog, tapi malas. hu2. banyak je mende nak cite. tapi takde mood or takde masa. ceyyy, macam bz sangat je kata takde masa. but true in a sense that i rather use my precious time to sleep, spend 'quality time with my family', layan kpop & kdrama dan ye facebook. you see, sekarang i tengah keje kat farmasi, 9 jam or more 6 hari seminggu, so besela macam orang bekerja yang lain, penat. heh. dekat je dengan rumah, jalan kaki tak sampai 5 minit. jimat duit transport & makan(kadang2 bawak bekal). takde uniform (tapi macam bakal ada. tak suka T_T), pekerja semua perempuan and surau, tandas semua ada. oh, bazar/pasar malam pun depan farmasi je (really come in handy time pose ari tu). lepas tu everyday mingle dengan ubat (bukak dictionary farmasi, u know familiarise yourself dengan kandungan ubat & what it does etc..) kira macam its the perfect-tengah-berhenti-belajar-sekejap-tapi-bakal-sambung-belajar-semula-job for me. although, i'm not gonna lie. its been pretty rough at the beginning. kena marah dengan senior sebab lambat catch up, kena tengking dengan bos sebab tak fulfil expectation die, kena hadap supllier & customer yang gatal, gaji tak berapa nak lumayan, cuti seminggu sekali, and a few fussy customer. biasala tu kan, adat bekerja.

what i found out was, stress bekerja & stress belajar sangatlah lain. and personally, i prefer stress belajar. *sekarang tengah tengok hana kimi versi korea(to the beautiful you), baru episod 1. rasa macam rindu sangat perasaan first2 daftar kat uni, reloading barang kat bilik baru, jumpa roomate baru, getting ready to class, meeting new friends and BELAJAR BERSUNGGUH2. seryes kangen bangettt...

yyep  minho(shinee) & sulli(fx) are the main reason why i watch this. lagipun hana kimi(jepun) lawak & best gile kottt. kira episod 1 ni okla. skang jarang tengok kdrama, sebab lambat sangat storyline die, lagi suka tengok variety macam we got married, running man etc. blh tgk perangai sebenar dorang & more spontan, and ofkos lagi lawak. hihi 

besok patutnya nak gi sunway pyramid jumpa irah si pengantin baru. (sedih sangat ok tak dapat gi wedding die kat terengganu, dah plan dah dengan jiha nak naik bas sume2. abah2, ari tu saya balik dari czech transit kat istanbul ke malaysia,sorang2 selamat je. ni nak pegi terengganu je pun tak bagi, siap ada kawan teman lagi. hu3. kalau keluar, balik lepas maghrib sikit je pun da masam muka. but, i guess that's just proves he cares so much about me, us, yela anak semua pompuan, yang laki tu baru nak tukar suara. ehem). nak sangat jumpa member2 study, tapi sunway macam jauh sangat, perjalanan je nak lebih sejam, tu belum kena tunggu bas bagai. aigooo. i guess. pagi besok kena call die la, confirmkan cane, maybe tukar venue ke.


moving on, as u all know, sekarang musim kawen. banyak gila invitation kawen. and honestly, it sucks actually going to weddings knowing that ur single. dont get me wrong, suka sangat gi wedding, seryesly hepi sangat dapat jumpa kawan, hepi utk kawan yang akan menjalani fasa baru dlam hidup die, its just that, well, i dont have everything figured out macam diorang. diorang akan habis belajar then have a stable job dengan gaji yang memuaskan and they already have someone sekufu untuk spend the rest of their happy life. insyaallah. and of course they deserve it. what i'm feeling now is not envy, its inferior. (oh god, so sorry for my deteriorating english. it just comes naturally. i'm literally writing down my thoughts which kadang2 dalam english berterabur). but really, sekarang i need to focus untuk sambung belajar. u dont know how much i wanted to prove to myself that i'm not this loser person who kept being sedih about kena balik. u dont know how i longed to be proud of myself. to actually say i'm not embarrassed of myself. aishh, drama lagi. belum lagi masa untuk fikir pasal jodoh (eventhough i always do) berhenti berharap and seriously just do your best in everythng you do. yoshhhh! (tak habes2 nak motivatekan diri sendiri).

sorila macam entri budak skema, besela lama tak berblog. heh. peace

random

# i love pisau tajam

# i get bored easily, but i never get bored of apple XD

# suka guna smileys kat skype, coz die gerak2

# my laptop desperately needs a cooler pad (waiting for pc fair, bulan 4 maybe??? nak yang murah jugak, biala biala)

# dengar lagu sentimental sambil makan coklet, memang layan~

# nak earfon in-ear kaler putih. xmau headphones sebab suka bawak tdo & masa jog tak jatuh *eceh jog pun bape kali je 

# kalau angau, memang dasyat -_- but, nobody ever knew *bangga

# in a lookout for mp3

# tarian kpop sangat susah tapi sangat kreatif. takpe, practice makes perfect

# sangat minat dengan us dramas, always one step ahead. expect the unexpected 

# susah nak tido. banyak sangat fikir. kadang2, opt untuk distract kepala dengan layan movie, sampai exhausted baru boleh tido 

# tak sabar nak tengok breaking dawn part 2!!!!

# i adore peti ais besar (kat czech kecik kot freezer die)

# how can you not love romantic comedy???